So, obviously, I removed the Ex as a friend from Facebook as soon as I asked him to leave, and also removed all of our mutual friends that were definitely his friends and not mine. Well, I say as soon as, it took a couple of days' worth of seeing him becoming friends with girls I didn't know to make me feel sick enough to remove him.
I didn't realise until today, however, that I could still see his wall. The new girl has posted something about 'teaching him how to poke'. Stupid cow.
Although, obviously, I am the stupid one for looking at his Facebook page. If this was 15 or even 10 years ago, I wouldn't be party to any of his day to day conversations and flirting with other girls. I would be able to more effectively remove myself from his life. I find myself impulsively needing to check his Facebook (and Twitter...don't get me started) profile, and I can't really work out why. It really hurts to see any update of any kind, because honestly no update is going to make me feel good, even 'what have I done, I regret it all' because I genuinely don't want him back. Yet, I torture myself checking out the new girl, and her friends, and any photos I can find...
My best friend told me that I need to stop, for my own sanity. And I agree with him. But I'm not sure how. Are break ups more difficult now, because there is so much more publicly available information about all of us? Or has it not made a difference, because our relationships are shaped and influenced by the context they develop within; i.e. if in 1898 you break up with your boyfriend because he's been cheating on you, you've got other shit to contend with, like being labelled a whore/unreasonable woman and seeing your ex everywhere because you are unlikely to have the means to move away?
Anyway, one more check before bed...
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